Frustration isn't the word here; it's beyond that. What can I say. I just can't figure women out these days.

Following are 2 of the latest examples of what I've been going through consistently this entire year and I ask myself is it me or is it them. A little on me: "total East Coast-look", 45, single, but look in my 30s, dress to the nines most of the time when I'm out, and women tell me I'm so handsome and a "real man", etc. etc.

The first one is a 22-year-old cocktail waitress at local posh lounge I had been acquainted with when she worked at a restaurant I used to frequent a couple years ago. I always flirted with her but never made a move because she was seeing one of the managers who was also an acquaintance of mine. Now that she wasn't seeing him any longer, we "re-acquainted", I gave her my card, and soon after she was asking me out - and doing it right in front of another very attractive girl I had just met and was hanging out with at the time. That was a bit awkward so I really didn't acknowledge her on the spot. She later called and asked me out. Of course I accepted. We chatted for a bit and I told her that I always thought she was a doll and that I'd call her back to set up the date before her night off. Great, I thought. I waited a couple days before her night off and left a message to set up the date. Those couple days and the day of the date come and go without hearing a word back from her. I call her later in the day to say, hey, I need to make other plans, unless I hear back from you. Nothing. Zip. I'm back in the club she works at on the weekend and I ignore her when I see her. She comes up behind and taps me on the shoulder, apologizing profusely that she flaked, using the exuse that she got called into work at the last minute. I'm thinking to myself, well, you ever hear of common courtesy and calling back to cancel, but I said nothing. She reacted by saying "Oh, you must hate me now..." Again, I didn't react. My buddy later gets in between, tries to smooth things out and convinces me to give her a second chance. Like any single man with hormones, I say sure, what've I got to lose? So this time she promises to not flake and that she'll call me. She never calls. I'm in the club again with another very attractive woman, a friend of mine, and I semi-ignore her. She says the same thing - that Oh, he hates me now...I leave without saying goodbye. I come in again the following weekend, this time with my male buddy. She confronts me, sits down next to me, looking me straight in the eyes, again apologetic. I turn to my buddy and ask if I should I give her a third chance. He nods and I say what the heck and she exclaims, "yesss!" So here I go again - calling her and again leaving another message (she never picks up). You guessed it. She never responds. Since then, she never apologized nor do I bring up her flaking out for the third time. I still show up to the joint with a different girl almost every time she's there; it's not meant to spite her, but I just have many females that are just friends and we just wind up hanging out there.

The most recent one involves a 35-year-old bartender/flight attendant at an out-of-town upscale restaurant I dined at. On the second visit there I noticed her, but again, did not try to pick on her, let alone stare; she gets enough of that from the local crowd every night. My buddy and I needed a place to hang out at that night, but didn't know where to go since we were visitors. I ask the manager and he says to talk to the bartender. Not only does she give me the lowdown on the hotspots, but later comes right up to our table TWICE, once to formally introduce herself and tell us she and her girlfriends want to meet us after she gets off work, and then to give me her card with her personal cell phone # with directions to the club on the back. My buddy, who was facing her station (my back was turned to her), said that all this time she kept staring straight at me; she even made sure to come back to our table as soon as we started conversing with some other girls at a nearby table, interrupting the conversation and making her presence known! She tells me to make sure and call her on her cell if we get lost and come by the bar before we take off. My buddy kept remarking about how aggressive she was and that if I needed any more of a sign of interest, I ought to be put away. I remained hopefull, but didn't really expect anything out of it. I even thought for a moment we were being set up by her and her "friends" which I thought could be a bunch of call girls with her using the restaurant as a front; it just seemed too quick and almost like she was being too professional and overly hospitable, but, then again, that could just be part of who she is and her apparent job, etc. So, we make it over to the club expecting to meet her, but she's no where to be found. I figure, oh well, here's another flake. I call her and she said she got tied up at work and will be there in 30 minutes. So, she finally shows up. Her girlfriends never made it or left before she got there. Well, the girl was nothing like what I thought, or so it seemed from our conversation between her, my buddy, and myself. I noticed throughout our hanging out that she divided her conversation equally between my friend and myself, showing no apparent favoritism. I was hard to tell who she truly might be interested in, if us at all. The joint was about to close, so we headed outside and that where a lot was revealed; she revealed that she was in a relationship, was dissatisfied, and made it clear she was "open to meeting new people" looking straight into my eyes as she said it. She asked for a card even though I had hers and said that I needed a woman in my life like her and to call her. So, I take it to the next level and call her a couple days after I returned back home, leaving a message. I never hear back from her. Against my better judgement, I call her one more time. Zip. I send her an email a couple days ago. Nothing.

I don't get it. Why the games? I've never encountered this before, so have at it...